WARNING: Contains salty language; read at your own risk!
I don't know how I lived through some of the things I did when I was younger, or how I avoided getting into trouble for them. I do know, for an absolute fact, that you could never, ever get away with most of this today.
We should all have a book of adventures, a collection of stories that are our moments we love to look back on fondly and laugh.
The stories you are about to read are true; the names have been changed to protect the guilty. If I ever offended anyone with the things I did, consider this my apology.
Now, hold my beer...