The complete run of David Langford's technical and humorous columns about Apricot Computers microsystems, written for Apricot File magazine from 1985 to 1988. Langford wrestles with MS-DOS and the various Apricot operating systems, wittily explains the inner secrets that Apricot PLC documented wrongly or not at all, and not at all incidentally tells many scabrous anecdotes about the contemporary British microcomputer scene.